I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize