ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Randomize
