yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
