after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
