Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
