you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
