Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
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