We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
