plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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