"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
