hotel room ftw
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
