I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Randomize
