Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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