Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Randomize
