I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
