So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
