how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
