:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize