I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
