Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
