her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
Four minutes until I can fart!
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Randomize
