Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Randomize
