ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Randomize
