I cannot find my penis.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
