I just made out with a guy for $7.
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize
