Apparently you make a good broom.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
