Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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