I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
