just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
