So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
