is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
