unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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