Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Say something about gay babies.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
