uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
