I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Bring me that man meat
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
