I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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