first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
