everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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