thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
