ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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