The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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