STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
i believe in u and ur pee
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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