I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize