she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Hippo gnu deer
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
True college students do jello shots in the library
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
