i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Randomize