Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
false alarm, still single
Randomize