Quick, to the slutcave!
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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