oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I want to walk on stilts...naked
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
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