real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
The uberlube is also flammable
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
