Christians are straight up FREAKS
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
