I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
