Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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